Song

Some friends and I have recently committed to learning guitar well enough to be able to lead worship among small ministry gatherings. I already know some basics and play by ear (from my piano days) and was picking out some of my favorite worship songs to practice to the other day. There was one in particular that as I figured out the cords and started playing/singing, the words, for the first time EVER completely overwhelmed me.
I had sung this song hundreds of times before, paying little attention to what I was actually pleading before my Father. I was overcome with emotion and began examining my heart "these are heavy words...do I really mean them when I sing?"
I desire to mean them...
I yearn for them to be sung honestly before The Lord, but I also recognize how deep of a commitment worshiping with those words entails.
And then I recognized how many times I have sung them in the past, in vain, and have not truly meant them at the core of my being.
But what a powerful song of total surrender to The Lord and his leading over our lives!!!

"Savior I come, quiet my soul
Remember redemption's hill, where your blood was spilled for my ransom.

Everything I once held dear, I count it all as loss.

You were as I, tempted and tried
You were human.
Your word became flesh, bore my sin and death
And now you're risen!!

Lead me to the cross, where your love poured out
Bring me to my knees, Lord I lay me down
Rid me of myself
I belong to you
Lead me to the cross.

Everything I once held dear, I count it all as loss."

Get Out of the Boat

We often hear/say to others: "we're just so blessed!" And while this is true in most regards, I have often found myself using this blessed term in regards to:

living comfortable lifestyles
being well-off
being safe & sound
living the "American Dream"

And while none of these are inherently bad, per say, something Jesus has been teaching our family lately is living in, and fully understanding the blessing of God - a lot of times - has to do with surrendering the above list, and fully abiding in His provision.

We've all heard the story of the ominous day on the lake where the Disciples got caught on their boat, in the middle of a gruesome storm. And how, in their fear and discomfort, they looked up to see Jesus walking on the water, out at sea, toward them.

The disciples were confused, still scared, rolling with the waves in their small fishing boat, when Peter cried out to Jesus asking if that was, in fact, Jesus.

Jesus confirmed it was He, and then invited Peter to step out of the boat and walk to him on water, in the midst of the raging sea.

NOW STOP. For Peter to do this was not safe/sound/comfortable (obviously). But He did it. He had immense faith in Jesus, and while the other disciples were too scared to ever do such a thing, Peter got out of the boat and walked to Jesus. Imperfect Peter...who even as He was walking to Jesus, lost his faith for a moment and started to sink, but Jesus, again, lifted him.

You see I find it most profound that Jesus never rebuked the clan of disciples who didn't want to get out of the boat. They were fine to stay. But Peter, in his faith, got to experience the blessing and power of Jesus in a way no other human has since experienced.
And while walking to Jesus, he was still weak and imperfect and needed a Savior as he lost faith and started to sink.
God uses the weak. Amazing.

I believe Jesus is doing BIG WORKS and massive movements for His kingdom all over the world, ever second that passes.

I also believe that He can accomplish such works all by Himself. He is God Almighty.

However, the God of the Universe INVITES US...you and I....to be a part of the great work He is doing. He invites us to partner with Him and be used as a missile of His power to penetrate the hearts of unbelievers and bring them to His Kingdom.

I have realized I can either sit in the boat and watch His work unveil, or get out of the boat, in total surrender and faith, and be a part of His great work...

What a privilege.

What a true blessing.

We only get a short lifetime to be a part of His work on earth before we join Him in His kingdom, yet we find ourselves concerned with menial things like making sure our kids are the best dressed, or that our houses are big and nicely decorated, or that our appearances please those around us...I am guilty of all, and like Peter, fail in my focus time and time again.

But our family has been praying lately to be more like Peter in the sense that we leave our comforts and surrender the safety of the boat for the sake of Jesus and experiencing Him in a way we never could if we clung tight to the boat.

That above list? I believe that is what awaits us in HEAVEN. Those things we long for in terms of security, safety, wealth, prosperity...we will attain those in perfect harmony living with our Savior in a very SHORT while. So why pursue that now, when God is preparing such things for us in Heaven?

(***my dad shared some of this about Peter with Jason and I, 4 years ago when we were making some tough decisions, and since it has grown like wildfire in my soul. It's a scary prayer to pray, but rich in blessing.***)

Jesus is BIG

I just love how Jesus can give us random ideas in our quiet moments with Him, and even if they seem big, hard, with lots of unanswered questions, He just asks that we "run with it" and watch Him tie up all the loose ends.
One of my favorite things about Jesus.

I've blogged about this some before, but for over a year some friends and I have had the complete PRIVILEGE of getting to know some incredible women from India. Thanks to Walmart, there is a massive Indian population here in our small Bentonville community, and bridging the two cultures and loving on each other has been such a blessing from the Lord.

This summer a few of my friends and I decided to minister to them through organizing a "kids camp" of sorts. Most of friends don't drive and they've told us how the kids get bored at the apartment complex when they are out for summer break.

Yesterday was our first camp and Jesus provided BIG. We got numerous donations from vendors, parents, families, for the snacks, games, and crafts, and then a ton of our cell group girls came to help, as well as some of their mothers. We ended up having about 50ish Indian kids/mothers show up for this first one which is INCREDIBLE. It was total chaos, total fun, and I left with such a full heart. We have so many amazing stories from those 2 hours of Jesus just showing himself and his love for all of us. How great we serve a Jesus that loves EVERYONE...regardless of your culture! He came to save us ALL!!!

I can't wait to see what He is going to do and how He will provide for the rest of the summer!!!

The Mango Won

I discovered a new found love.
Mangos.
A few weeks ago they were sampling them at Sam's and I actually turned around and bought a box (that sample stuff never works on me...until mangos).
They are smaller and juicier than typical ones you get at the store. They are amazing. I ate on average about 2/day until the box was gone, then went and bought another box.

I found myself saying more than once as I would cut one "I bet in Heaven, mangos don't have seeds and are easier to eat."

Then a few days ago, I realized the seeds in mangos were the least of my worries.

After a series of strange symptoms (mouth severely chapped, cracked, red, and swollen), I discovered through Google (of course) that I am allergic to mangos.

Incredibly disheartening.

Did you know that the same poisonous substance found in poison ivy is the SAME substance found in the rinds of mangos??? And that if you are allergic to poison ivy, chances are you will have problems when coming in to contact with rinds of mangos?

Yeah. True story. Who knew. oh - and I'm horrifically allergic to poison ivy.

The reaction has also spread to my left eye which is horribly red, swollen, and incredibly itchy. Fun times. Watch out for those mangos. Or just cut them nicely instead of devouring them in the manner that one eats orange slices (like I did).

Consider yourself warned!

Got a Computer

 

First off, we finally got a computer (yeah!), so I have been uploading some pictures from my camera that have been sitting around, but I'm more distracted currently watching the Moore tornado coverage. Jason's brother lives in Moore and his family's house was hit (they are fine, thank the Lord), but that's where Jason lived a chunk of his life and we are glued (like many of you, I'm sure).

 

So for now, I will say, Adelynn's party was awesome. She is more like Lincoln than we knew in that she loved the attention, knew it was her day, and was a social little thing. It was precious. And this one pic sums it up:

 

My precious 1-year-old. I love you dearly little angel.
Now stop growing up!!!!! :)

Hiatus

It's been a while. How are you? I am great, thank you. Except my laptop screen got crushed a while ago (hence my sole involvement on only Instagram on social media).
Working on finding me the cheapest possible replacement...think: <200 acer="" maybe="" p="">But in the meantime I am doing this without a conventional keyboard which means little to none posting by me.

The past month has been very busy, but fun busy...working in some fun stuff for this summer to do with huge group of little kids, friends, and my awesome  freshmen cell group girls (more to come on that later), but this week, working on big girls FIRST birthday party!!!! Can't wait!

Adelynn has been growing up so much lately. She is in a forward facing seat now, drinks solely whole milk (bye bye formula), eating things like hotdogs and other kid stuff, and starting to stand on her own unassisted...close to walking maybe?????
She is just now getting in only her third tooth. Praise The Lord she still sleeps awesome...sleeps from about 8-8:30/9 through night and takes a long 3-4 hour nap in the afternoon with her brothers. Not much news there.

Seriously I just love her to bits. I have also taken a hiatus from my good camera and am excited to get some one year pics of her soon.

This Stuff is GOOD

I have been reading through Acts (now I'm into Romans) with the perspecive of learning how the early church started and how they set out to fulfill the Great Commission (on the direct curtails of Jesus proclaiming it to them).

I've read this book several times in the past, but have recently been reading in The Message translation for a paraphrased view. It has been awesome and completely inspiring.

Did you know that right after Jesus gave that commandment, that the "church" (or Believers in Jesus) sold ALL THEY HAD...their land, their homes, their goods...and pooled all of the money together for Peter (and other first disciples of Jesus) to distribute out amongst the church according to NEED?? And then they used the rest of the money to aid in their efforts of spreading the Gospel to all nations??
Seriously?

I wonder how many people were reluctant to do such a radical thing because they viewed their "Stuff" as belonging to them...or they not dare give their things up because, after all, they had worked hard for those things and deserved them...

Acts actually talks of only 2 such people: a husband and wife. They sold their land and goods like the rest, but only gave the church a portion of what they made - not all of it. Peter called them out to repent and come clean, but they still were dishonest. And you know what happened, the Lord struck them both dead.

That's pretty radical.

I can't help but think of if our current church...my current church...did the same. What f every member who was serious about being a disciple of Jesus and spreading His name among the nations did the same?
What if I were to completely entrust the Elders of our church with EVERYTHING God has blessed me and my family with, to then distribute to people what they needed, and use the rest to further the Kingdom...

Do I trust God that much? Do I believe that advancing the Kingdom of God (taking the last words of Jesus seriously) is in fact a serious matter?

Would I be willing to throw away the mantra of "But we've worked so hard for this! My husband puts in so many hours, so we deserve a better ______!"

I wonder if I would have trusted Peter's guidance of the Holy Spirit to truly decipher what our family "needed"...

In conjunction with reading through Acts, I've also started reading "Multiply" by Chan/Platt.
At MultiplyMovement.com, you can read the entire book for FREE, watch the corresponding videos for FREE, get leader info to do in small groups for FREE...it's pretty awesome to see 2 men not concerned about the commercial aspects and revenue of sharing their giftings, but truly concerned with making disciples.

There's some pretty good stuff on that page. Sometimes I feel like I'm almost drowning in questions and prayers and I try and wade through some of Jesus' teachings on what it means to follow Him...but it's so incredibly addicting.

I have had a crazy number of GOOD conversations with my neighbor recently over a lot of these things. We haven't really hung out in a while and just spending some time with her recently has blown me away how much both of us have changed in the past few years...how God has gotten an absolute grip of both our hearts on these matters. Such a joy to talk about all these things and what God's been revealing and learning from each other...in my experience, those that agree with these radical teachings of Jesus are few.

Y'all, yesterday I sat with a very small group of women and got educated on the Muslim religion from an international who was raised Muslim. While she was sharing about the Muslim faith, I was overcome with "wow - Satan has such a GRIP in that belief system" and it almost felt impossible to ever break through such barriers. I mean, we're talking the wife is allowed (legally) to be murdered for leaving the Muslim faith...in this day and age!

But then...then came Sunday...then this girl shared her testimony, how God revealed Himself to her...how some German missionaries brought Jesus to her village one day...how she became a FOLLOWER of Jesus even though her parents disowned her for converting.
And now she is married, living among the people in Turkey (she is going back within the year), sharing JEsus and starting churches.
Isn't that amazing what our God can do??!!!!!

So check out MultiplyMovement. The intro video is awesome and short.
Check out Acts.
Would love to hear your thoughts.